what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
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