Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Randomize
