There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
