nut hugger
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Randomize
