but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Randomize
