the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
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