So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Randomize