if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
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