I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
