don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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