Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
