i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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