Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Shame is for Republicans.
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