found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize
