just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Randomize
