just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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