I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Randomize
