Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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