I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
