Pappa wants mamma naked
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
