I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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