He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
