when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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