i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
