there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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