I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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