ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize