it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize