she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
im calling her cock vulture from now on
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
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