Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Randomize
