There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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