Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Please don't give away my fajitas
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
