so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Found the puke drawer
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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