I think I just saw someone hide a body.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
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