she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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