yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize