only if we run a train.
done.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
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