I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
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