Don't you send me to vm
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
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