Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
All I want is dick and wine.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
