Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
is wine microwaveable?
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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