And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
