So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
