shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
