how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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