i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
