No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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