so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
