bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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