I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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