now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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